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Emma's Wedding Diary: The Bridal Gown

Had a fabulous day today! It started with Katie (now officially the best bridesmaid in the world) coming over with her copy of The Wedding Organizer Book and a big cake. Then we spent a couple of hours on the internet looking at different wedding dress designs (there are hundreds of sites out there and it doesn't cost a penny). We picked out wedding gown styles that I liked and printed them out to paste into my wedding planning notebook. Wedding gowns are kind of strange in that there are so many different styles that are "in fashion" at once, I was spoilt for choice! One thing for certain though, tea and cake is a critical part of the process.

Armed with said wedding notebook we went to one of the big bridal gown shops in town. I made an appointment there last week having found them in my Wedding Organizer - it's the best thing to do as then they can guarantee that one of the staff are available to give you their full attention, and it is absolutely essential on a Saturday when every other bride in the area is off work too!

I was a bit nervous to be honest. I kept thinking about how it's certainly the most I'll ever spend on a dress, for the most important day of my life, and what if Joe doesn't like it! But the assistant at the shop was so wonderful. She looked at the pictures of the wedding dresses that I like, looked at me, and then took me round all of the wedding gowns, picking out ones she thought might be good and also several styles that I wouldn't have dreamt of! Katie was great and encouraged me to try them all when I looked doubtful, which I'm so glad I did as I was pleasantly surprised by several of the "risky" ones. Keeping an open mind in that situation is so important.

Wedding gowns and the dreaded body shape

There was quite a lot to bear in mind in terms of finding the right wedding dress. Firstly my shape. My figure is far from perfect, but there are certain styles that suit certain shapes. Full skirts and tailored bodices seem to be good for people like me with bigger hips but a smaller waist as the fullness of the skirt hides chunky thighs and bottoms! I had a good chat with the assistant about it as all of my bridesmaids have completely different shapes. Katie, being tall and thin (which I no longer hate her for!) suits softer, elegant lines and wide or scooped necklines. Natalie, being very petite would suit something in an A-line, or a design with princess seams - nothing to cut her off at the waist and make her look smaller. Nicola has got quite a boyish figure, with a small bust and quite a thick waist. She'll look good in an Empire line apparently, preferably one with some fabric gathered over the bust to make it look like there's more there and balance her out.

You can also get wonderful jackets with some dresses to cover up any arm crimes, and short bolero style jackets are back in and they accentuate slender waists and detract from small busts too. Hmmm, seems I did learn something today! The assistants at these shops know all the tricks so it really pays to listen to them. If it were a winter wedding I could have had a glorious velvet coat or cloak - there was a deep red one that almost made me change the date!

Wedding Dress Colours and Fabrics Galore!

Another factor was colour. A wedding dress doesn't have to be white, we must have said that twenty times over the cake, and we were right. There are many different colours and shades available, getting the one right for my skin tone was worth the effort. Again, the assistant was brilliant, and she even got some samples of the different types of white (yes, there's more than one!) and held them against me to show me which ones were best. Some colours drain skin, whilst others make you seem even healthier, and it seems that there are few women who can carry off the pure "diamond white" wedding dresses.

The type of fabric needed to be considered too in light of the month of the wedding. Mine is bang in the middle of summer, so I was eager to look at wedding dresses made of silks, muslin and other lighter fabrics, whereas if it were earlier in the year when the weather is less predictable a back up plan such as a matching wrap or jacket would be a good idea. Yet again the brocades and velvets of the winter wedding dresses were tempting but in the middle of August even I could see that wouldn't be a good idea.

Comfort was also important. Whilst I want to look my best, I don't want to be dying in my wedding dress after ten minutes. When I'd narrowed the favourite wedding gowns down, the assistant let me spend some time walking around and sitting down too, just to be sure.

Size was a topic of debate as I tend to lose weight when I'm nervous, so I think I might be smaller on the day than I am now. The assistant reassured me that they can do adjustments and there'll be a couple of wedding dress fittings in the lead up to the day. They have a price package that incorporates a certain number of fittings, and this can be different depending on the wedding dress (i.e. if it has a wide skirt with a hem that goes on forever!) so I need to be sure to get specific details for whichever dress I go for.

To bra or not to bra? That is the question...

I had been reluctant to try on strapless bodices, thinking that I'd be pulling it up all day or that I'd "fall" out of it. But the amount of structure in these bodices really put my mind at rest - if it's fitted properly, it should stay where I want it.

That reminds me, when I make my final choice (Katie took pictures of me in the different wedding dresses with her digital camera and e-mailed them to me so I can remember them), I need to get the underwear as soon as possible. It's best to have the real underwear on at the time of the fittings, as the bra could change my shape in important ways when dealing with very fitted wedding gowns. With some bodices I won't need a bra, but there will still be a suspender belt and knickers and it will be good to know that neither of them show at a fitting rather than on the wedding morning! Also good for comfort too - I'll have time to change it all if it's uncomfortable with the dress. The height of the shoes is important too so I also need to have those for the wedding dress fittings so the hem is the right length. It'll be good to wear them around the house a bit before the day too, only when Joe is out though!

Tiara's, Veils and Flowers oh my!

One of the great things about going to this specialist shop was that they also had all the matching veils and accessories. It was really useful being able to try the whole thing on at once. Of course, it doesn't mean I can't look elsewhere (there are some amazing tiara specialists out there), but it was useful to see what type of veil goes with each dress. With some of them the shade may be hard to match so getting the matching one might be the best option.

The jury is still out on what to put on my head. There are so many choices: tiara, veil, both together, nothing, fresh flowers or even a hat! I'll talk to the florist about the flowers, after all, the tiny fresh roses that my friend Sarah had in her hair at her wedding last year looked gorgeous. I guess it depends on the dress I choose - some wedding dresses seemed to suit a grand veil whilst some of the more simple ones might be drowned out by one.

I'm going to look at a couple of other shops, no need to rush such a big decision! Katie knows someone who had their dress made by a designer dressmaker and she said it was amazing, so I'll look into that too. Then I could be certain the design is individual and has all of the bits I want in the dress. Again, the portfolio will be a crucial thing to see, and good reports from other clients too.

I'm going to look at those photos again and then make an appointment with this dressmaker too. Hmm... maybe more cake is needed.