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Emma's Wedding Diary: Outfits for the Bridal Party

The Groom and Male Attendants

Whilst it may be traditional for me to choose my dress away from Joe, there's no way I'm letting him organise the wedding outfits for him and the boys without me!

There are a number of options for the groom and male wedding attendants, as ever. Joe is quite keen on having a designer suit, maybe even one specially tailored for him. It would look wonderful with a silk tie to match the wedding colour theme. It would be very contemporary as a style though, and I'm not sure it will work with the rest of the theme.

I'm more keen on him and the other male attendants wearing something more traditional such as a frockcoat or morning suit. They look elegant and are very flattering; they can disguise beer bellies very well! Waistcoats and cravats really make it all look very special - when else do blokes look that smart and aristocratic? Some people go for canes, top hats and gloves, the works, but I'll leave that decision to Joe, that may be too much and if someone looks ridiculous in a hat it's silly to force them to wear it as they'll just be embarrassed and awkward all day.

In America it's more acceptable to wear black tie as an alternative, but it's much less popular over here, and I wouldn't want to feel like I was being escorted to a ball rather than my wedding day.

Basically we need to go to the specialist hire shops that I've seen in my Organizer and have him try on lots of things - it'll be nice to watch for a change! I'm going to take a sample of the bridesmaid dress fabric so we can match the colour for any cravats and waistcoats. We need to sort it out as early as possible as it's a summer wedding.

We're going to hire all the male attendant outfits from the same place as that way we're more likely to get a discount. As some of our Ushers live quite a long way away we can get their measurements and place an order for them with a fitting closer to the wedding, or if it is one of the bigger suppliers they may have an outlet close to their home towns.

We must remember the shoes too. No point having fabulous outfits if they all turn up in their scuffed work shoes! Hiring may be the best way to make sure that they are all smart and suitable.

I must admit that this is the only time I've wished Joe was in the armed forces, then he could wear full dress uniform on the day! We'd still have to arrange the clothes for the other attendants though.

Sarah had a pageboy at her wedding, he was dressed in a miniature version of what the men were wearing. We thought it looked very cute, but she has since confessed to me that they'd tried to get him to wear a more traditional pageboy outfit and he'd thrown such a tantrum about it they gave up! I suppose a wilful child is one less thing I have to worry about!

The Bridesmaids

When I was a teenager, the fashion was for all bridesmaids to wear the same style, no matter whether it suited them or not. Mine are lucky in that things are much more relaxed now, and it is perfectly acceptable for them to wear different styles as long as there is some theme running through them, the same fabric and colour for example. As my four are all such radically different shapes this is the way forwards for us. I was talking to a dressmaker the other day and she said that sometimes it is possible to find a style that can just be gently adapted for each shape - for example, a slightly different neckline and/or hemline for each dress.

We had a girly night in and talked it over. I didn't want to impose my ideas on them too much as they are all adults and I want them to have a lovely day too. They're happy that they have choice over the style, and we all agreed that the best thing to do is to go to a bridal shop and start putting them in different dresses to see what suits them best. Specialist outlets may be able to cater for different styles in the same fabric, if not I'll look into getting a dressmaker. When we know what we're doing we'll have to make sure the lingerie is right too, just like when I had to sort my dress out it's a really important thing to get right. The shops or the dressmaker will be able to help us pick the right styles, if some go for fitted bodices they may not need bras anyway.

Katie is trying to convince me to rope in the neighbour's little girl to being a flower girl because she saw the cutest outfit on the web of one dressed like a fairy princess. I told her that she can save that for her wedding!

Mothers

We have a total of three as Joe's stepmother will be there too so it's even more important that we make sure that they tell us which colour they are choosing as soon as possible so there are no clashes. Mum is keen to know what the others are wearing as she is paranoid about turning up in the same outfit as them!

I'm going to take her to the specialist outlets in my Wedding Organizer Book as they will be able to advise not only on which style will suit her best and what type of underwear is needed, but will also be able to help with a hat and shoes too. A hat is no longer obligatory at a wedding, and there are some lovely hair accessories that add a bit of sparkle or feathers that set off an outfit just as well.

She'll need to decide if she wants to wear it for other occasions, if so it may be best to get something a little more simple and wear a spectacular hat to make it special for the day.

It may be best to hire the hat if she's only going to wear it once, but it's up to her. I'm sure she'll want to have a hat trimmed in the same fabric.

I'm going to make sure she doesn't go mad with the shoes, she'll be on her feet a lot of the day and so comfort is really important. Like me, she's going to wear them around the house before the day so to break them in.

The "Going Away" Outfit

We're going to wear our wedding outfits for the whole day and well into the evening reception so that all of the guests will get a chance to see us all dressed up. I will stay in my dress until we go away as I'll be able to dance in it, but if it were very cumbersome I would be tempted to get something else to wear for the dancing (any excuse for a new party dress). Joe is supposed to stay in his formal gear until I change - I hope he doesn't complain too much about the cravat!

Going away outfits can be something that a lot of thought is put into, especially if the destination is a romantic honeymoon hotel. We may be a bit more relaxed as we are starting the honeymoon proper when we get abroad, it seems a bit odd to buy a special outfit to drive to an airport hotel. Saying that, we want to dress smartly for the flight so that we have a better chance of getting an upgrade!

We just need to make sure that anything we want to change into is kept in a safe and accessible place. The toastmaster will announce us leaving, and that's when I throw the bouquet, or rather the mini version of it. Then we'll have our big send off (I hope I don't cry). Sarah said that it took them hours to wind down from the excitement of the day even though they were exhausted! Mum has warned us not to get worried if we feel a bit flat once it's all over as it's only natural. I'll just be glad to lie on a beach and not be writing any more lists!